There are message boards on breastcancer.org. When each month begins, someone starts a thread for everybody starting chemo at the same time - to compare notes and side effects, ask questions, find out if what's happening to us is normal or at the very least shared by anyone else. The March 2015 chemo thread was a lifeline for me: a group of people all as shell-shocked and horrified over what was happening to them as I was, people who immediately, without question, understood to the depths of their hearts what nobody else in my life could. We got to know each other, and we became friends.
We kept in touch for a long time on the website, and then started a private facebook group. There are about 45 of us still posting, some more than others. One of our members, Katy, moved to Baja California after she finished treatment, and I joked a few months ago we should all visit her for our three-year cancerversary. I was joking! Really! But soon enough, it was happening.
We all flew into San Diego, where another one of our members lived. She and her husband rented a conversion van and picked us all up at the airport and we drove to Mexico. Ten ladies in a van! Plus Roger. Roger was a saint.
There is already a wall at the Mexican border in San Diego, FYI. It took about 5 minutes to go through. We had some extra screening but as soon as the guard opened the door and saw a bunch of middle-aged women they waved us through.
Our first stop was a little grocery-slash-liquor store. They had a huge variety of tequilas. We did a tequila tasting and I was surprised to find I could actually tell a difference! I had approximately 1/2 tsp per taste.
We also picked up snacks here and bottled water, as it really is true you shouldn't drink the water in Mexico.
Half the group rented an AirBNB house around the corner from Katy's house and the other half stayed in a hotel about a mile away. I'm a bad sleeper and was concerned everyone might be crazy so I got my own room using my corporate American Express points. It was a beautiful place but not fancy.
My suite was possibly overkill for one person. But it was the equivalent of about $80 a night, so.
The hotel is on a golf course.
Katy's house was about a ten minute walk across the golf course. I spent the three days walking back and forth with my new friend Diane, who is 57 and from Virginia. She is a delight. The March 2015 diagnosis is her second round with breast cancer.
The first full day in Mexico, we set out in the conversion van for a day in Baja California wine country. (Who knew Baja California has wine country?) First we went to a fantastic cheese shop and had some samples.
When we got to the first winery I was surprised to find that it seemed like a real professional place and the wine was genuinely very good.
They had a table set up for us under a 500 year old oak tree with snacks. It was a little chilly but we managed.
Then we were off to the second destination. Baja California is very interesting: beautiful places interspersed with not-so-beautiful. There is a large American ex-pat community there.
The second winery was at the end of a very long, bumpy dirt road. I had no idea what to expect - but this beautiful valley was certainly a surprise.
We had some amazing food here that I didn't take pictures of - a tropical fruit ceviche - and, of course, more wine.
The third stop was a very small little place owned by an American woman. They make pizza here to serve with the wine.
This dog wanted my pizza.
The winery bathroom is in the trailer where the winery owner lives. It's just her regular bathroom.
In the evening we sat around Katy's house with - you guessed it - more cheese and wine.
I'm no stranger to internet friends, but I'd never met or even talked offline to any of these people before. It was a bit daunting, getting in a van in San Diego and driving into Mexico and realizing that even if I wanted to, I'd have no way to leave - but all of these ladies turned out to be fantastic. We had people from all over the U.S. and one who came all the way from Australia. I was pretty sure after the first day that this coming to this thing was one of the best decisions I'd ever made.
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